New Pictures

We FINALLY got new pictures of Nathaniel. He is just over a year old. Still no news on when he will be coming home.

Blessings,
Melissa

A Rant

OK people time for me to rant. I have been reading alot lately that some people want to end ALL international adoptions. ALL. Their reasoning is that a child loses it's birth culture and a country committs social genocide through international adoption. First of all, only 1% of all international orphanes ever get adopted, domestically or internationally. And second, is it better for a child to grow up in an institution only to age out with no support system, no family? Statistics show that most of these children resort to prostitution(male and female) or some other crime to get money to live. And they often abuse drugs and alcohol to numb their pain. And some children with medical special needs often move from an institution for children to an adult institution and stay there for the rest of their lives. Yes, it is true a child may lose their birth culture through international adoption, but they gain a FAMILY! God's plan is for children to grow up in families, not institutions. Another argument is that most of the children available for international adoption are special needs kids and most adoptive families want healthy babies. Not true! People who choose international adoption know what children are available and still willingly choose it.And "special needs" can mean many different things. When we were trying to adopt from Ghana, we were interested in a 12 year old boy whose only special need was that he was a 12 year old boy! But Ghana stopped all international adoption. So what happens to that boy when he ages out of the orphanage at 16? Even Nathaniel was considered special needs because he is a boy. I cannot bear to think what would happen if we couldn't adopt him. Yes, it is best for children to remain in thier birth families and countries if possible, but because we live in a fallen, imperfect world it is NOT always possible or what is best for the child and adoption is a GOOD alternative.

Blessings,

Melissa

Very Sad News

We have had some very sad news. David's mother Virginia passed away last night. She had been in the hospital for a week and we knew the end was near. Still it is a hard thing to loose a beloved mother, mother-in-law, grandmother, and great grandmother. She will be sorely missed, but we have the assurance that she is now in Glory with Jesus. She no longer is in any pain.

My heart breaks to see the pain my husband and children are going through. I wish I could make it all better for them, but unfortunately I can't. I am also sad because Nathaniel will never know his sweet grandma. She was looking forward to meeting him.

The house seems very quiet and still tonight. It will be hard to get used to not having her here. We have kept her bedroom door closed today because it is just too hard to not see her sitting in her chair drinking her coffee and reading her book.

We are trying to remember that although we are sad, she is rejoicing because she is with her Saviour.

Blessings,
Melissa

Merry Christmas

Merry Christmas everyone!!!!
Hope you got to spend it with your family. I did.
An update on our adoption. We have finished our dossier. It will now be sent to DRC to be translated and then filed in the courts. It is slow, but we are making progress. I can't wait for Nathaniel to come home.
Speaking of Nathaniel, we have decided to changed his American name. We originally were going to call him Nathaniel James, but after watching some adoption education DVDs, we have decided to keep his original name,Gabriel,as his middle name. So his new American name will be Nathaniel Gabriel.

My mother has made a stocking for everyone in our family over the years. She made one for Nathaniel this year. I hope next year he will be able to enjoy it next year.

My husband bought me a necklace for Christmas with the names and birthstones of ALL my children, including Nathaniel. I LOVE IT!!!!!

My computer is messing up so I can't post the pictures. I might try again later.

Blessings,
Melissa

Orphan Sunday 2013

Today is Orphan Sunday. A lot has changed since this day last year. Last year I wondered who and where our new child was. But this year we know who our child is. He is a beautiful, sweet baby boy that we have named Nathaniel. And we know where he is. He is in an orphanage in Kinshasa, DRC.

But some things are the same. We still don't know when he will be home. I still wonder how he is. Is he safe? I still wonder, do think about your new Mommy? I think about you all the time. Even though we have not met you, Daddy and I love you already. WE can't wait until you are home with us. Desiree asked just this morning if you were flying from Africa yet. She wants you home too.

Nathaniel has found his forever family and we have found the baby we have longed for, but my heart goes out to all the other millions of orphans that have not yet found theirs. I know that God has not called everyone to adopt, but I think that many more could. If you are thinking about adoption, I encourage you to go for it. There are so many children waiting.

Blessings,
Melissa

Prayer Needed

Well we have had an eventful week here.

I had yet another bout of diverticulitis. I went to bed last Tuesday night with some discomfort. By 2 am I was in tremendous pain. I woke David up with my crying. I went to the doctor Wednesday and got 2 antibiotics and some pain killers. By Friday I was fine.

My niece Sarah got married Friday. Desiree was the flower girl. She had a blast.

Speaking of Desiree, she has been saying that when she gets older she will live with her dad. I asked her who told her that and she said her father. If you ask her if she wants to live with him, she will tell you yes, she does. And why wouldn't she? She can have anything she wants. He never tells her no; about anything! If she wants ice cream for breakfast he lets her have it. What kid wouldn't want that?
But on an unconscious level she is terrified. She has been having dreams of me leaving her. She now has to sleep with the lamp on. She cries when I put her to bed at night now. I can't even leave her in the nursery any more because she is afraid that I won't come back.
So David and I have decided to get full custody of her. We want her to have a strong sense of security and permanence. Our daughter, Desiree's mother, is 100% in support of us. Her father has said that he will sign the papers, but he hasn't yet. I hope he does the right thing and thinks of her more than himself. If he doesn't then we go to court.

We received some bad news about our adoption of Nathaniel. The DRC has suspended all exit visas for adopted children. The exit visa is the very last piece of paperwork in the adoption process for DRC. Without it even a legally adopted child cannot leave the country. They have said this could last for up to 12 months. I am praying that they will reverse there decision quickly.
This stems from an article about internationally adopted children that were "re-homed" after they were brought to the US. The article stated that adoptive parents would list their child on websites and give them away to virtual strangers who had not gone through the rigorous background checks that adoptive parents go through. Many of these children were abused.
I agree that this is a horrible situation, but it is a very small percentage of adoptions and the article does not tell of all of the wonderful adoption stories that exist. And the children living in orphanages are not immune to abuse. I ask for your prayers; that the suspension will be over quickly and for Nathaniel's safety.

Blessings,
Melissa

What we have been up to lately

Well a lot has happened since my last entry. We received our placement agreement which means that we are officially matched with Nathaniel. Our home study is FINALLY finished and has been approved by the GA office. Now we are waiting for it to be approved by the corporate office. We have begun gathering the documents for our dossier.
We got a loan to pay for some of the fees that are currently due. We were quite surprised that we were approved for it since our credit is not so good. And David cashed out his 401K to pay for the rest of the fees that are currently due. So we are no longer in danger of loosing him!!!
We also had a spaghetti supper fundraiser at our church. It was a lot of work, but we had some really great people helping us. Between ticket sales and donations we raised $1,800. So grateful for our church! They have been so supportive through this whole process.

AS I had mentioned in a previous post, Desiree broke her leg and had rods put in to help it heal. She had the rods removed on August 8th. Everything went well. We were given the rods as a souvenir. She was up walking around in about 3 days. So thankful that we are done with this whole thing.

School has started again. Brandon is in 9th grade. Can't believe my baby is in high school. Desiree is doing great with school. She loves it.

Even though we have MONTHS to wait until Nathaniel comes home, I have been in a nesting mood. I have been wanting to get the house ready for him. So we rearranged Desi's room and set up the crib.

This is Nathaniel's side of the room. We did it in Winnie the Pooh.

And this is Desiree's side. She wanted her side decorated in Princesses because, you know, she IS a princess.

I think I have gotten you up to date on everything here.

Blessings,
Melissa